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[submit-error],form [submit-success],form [submitting]{display:none}[visible-when-invalid]{display:none}amp-live-list>[update]{display:none}amp-experiment,amp-share-tracking{display:none}.i-amphtml-jank-meter{position:fixed;background-color:rgba(232,72,95,0.5);bottom:0;right:0;color:#fff;font-size:16px;z-index:1000;padding:5px}amp-accordion{display:block!important}amp-accordion>section{float:none!important}amp-accordion>section>*{float:none!important;display:block!important;overflow:hidden!important;position:relative!important}.i-amphtml-accordion-content,.i-amphtml-accordion-header,amp-accordion,amp-accordion>section{margin:0}.i-amphtml-accordion-header{cursor:pointer;background-color:#efefef;padding-right:20px;border:1px solid #dfdfdf}amp-accordion>section>:last-child{display:none!important}amp-accordion>section[expanded]>:last-child{display:block!important}amp-story-page,amp-story[standalone]{display:block!important;height:100%!important;margin:0!important;padding:0!important;overflow:hidden!important;width:100%!important}amp-story[standalone]{background-color:#fff!important;position:relative!important}amp-story-page{background-color:#757575}amp-story .i-amphtml-loader{display:none!important}[amp-fx^=fly-in]{visibility:hidden} /*# sourceURL=/css/amp.css*/Mark Steel | The Independent

Mark Steel

@mrmarksteel
Mark Steel is a stand-up comedian, radio presenter and Independent columnist. He enjoys writing his column because no one ever takes it literally.

We are so bored with Brexit we'll agree to anything

No one will ever satisfy the people who scream complaints such as 'We used to have proper singers, like Engelbert Humperdinck, before the EU made all our music go metric'

Richard Branson – have you been on a British train journey recently?

Even these people who love crazy adventures, who row across the Pacific in a hollowed out zebra, or run across Syria carrying a combination boiler, aren’t so foolish as to attempt the rail journey from London to Brighton at a weekend

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England v Sweden: The alternative World Cup live blog

Follow every twist and turn of England's quarter-final match against Sweden in Samara 

May's Brexit talks at Chequers will go terribly, as they always do

Once we’re out of the EU, water companies won’t have to abide by EU laws on clean water, which is marvellous, because it’s our RIGHT to swallow maggots

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